From Theo's Field Journal

To Whom It May Concern: (if it concerns anyone at all, which I sincerely doubt.)
Ordinary I use this field journal for my scientific observations. Today however
I am writing this last will and testament in case I am killed while summering here at Brightwick By The Sea. Don’t laugh because it is entirely possible due to the fact that I have something dangerous in my loo. But more on that later. First, the important facts:

1. I am of sound mind. You are supposed to say that in wills. In fact I am of very sound mind, far sounder than any of the so-called adults I know. People sometimes miss this fact because a) they think all thirteen-year-olds are morons and b) I am not of sound body. That is because I had the pox demonic as a little child which made me, as my older brother Basil says “a limpy little runt.” My older sister Adelle says that is also why I am “obsessed” with demons. I believe it is why I am a genius.
2. I am actually dead. (I mean, not at this moment, obviously, but if you are reading this at my funeral or something I am.) I am stating this because I know I have pretended to be dead pretty convincingly on a few occasions but that was back when I was twelve and it was a phase.
3. I leave absolutely nothing to my older sister Adelle and my older brother Basil. Nothing. Jack. Bupkis.
4. I leave all of my research to the archives of the National Museum of Demonology. My telescope, binoculars, and extensive library I leave to a home for wayward orphaned boys fortunate enough to not have a family. I mean “unfortunate,” of course. A slip of the pen.
5. The demon in my loo I leave to her own devices. I can’t say I really know what’s best for her because I only found her on the beach this morning. But I do think that she should be set free. I am only keeping her now because I think she is wounded. She should not be given to any zoo and certainly not to any of those demon hunting bastards. Even if she is the thing that kills me, she should not be stuffed like one of Basil’s mallards. She is far too pretty to be harmed. If she is harmed, I will know and I will haunt you. Laugh all you want. I have my ways.


Sincerely,
Theo St. James